Dream Journal Excerpts II

More excerpts from my endless dream journal. I’ve decided that when I start a punk/pop/emo band, it’s going to be named “A Dream to Stay Awake.” Pretty sure that name isn’t taken. Maybe I should copyright it quick just to be safe. Each paragraph is a single dream, or a single night’s worth of interconnected dreams.

Dreamt I was masturbating and the apartment complex rental people came and set up a party in the courtyard even though it was the middle of the day and no one was around. One girl shot off fireworks and yelled through a megaphone and made eye contact with me, so I went to draw the blinds as far closed as possible. Doing that caused the people to notice me and call me out. One black dude came over and pressed his face through the blinds, to which I responded, “I’m butt ass naked in here.” He still climbed through the window and talked to me about Spoelstra, and then morphed into him when my back was turned. He was drinking a ghost pepper beer, which was incredibly, stupidly spicy.

Dreamt I was randomly invited to a local concert in a basement somewhere, shitty venue, and was given a front row seat, much to my chagrin. Turns out I was seated next to Matt Hansen, who was the artist in the show. He made really quiet electronic music. When I lay down on the pillow next to me, I could still barely hear it. His computer kept freezing because somehow the music was really resource intensive. The battery his soundboard was plugged into started smoking and shorted out. It was a terrible show. Later I walked home down the center of the highway with mom. She was pissed for some reason. It was a long walk.

Visiting East Lansing and I need somewhere to sleep but I couldn’t sleep at someone’s apartment and I forgot that other people I know live there. So instead of staying with real people, I just unrolled my sleeping bag in a snowy park and slept there. Woke up all warm and cozy, very comfortable, people walking around with their dogs, playing in the park. It felt a little awkward, but I was also just so comfortable. After I got up, I went to some reception hall, where Matt was hanging out with some other people I knew, I think Brandon was there too. I chatted with them, then remembered where I need to go and followed Matt out of the building. We walked down the street during some kind of street fair, people were making sculptures with snow even though it was pretty warm out. The snow was very, very soft, like confetti or something. Matt jumped in a big pile of snow and sank right down to the ground like it was dust. It was also rainbow colored, which was disconcerting. People around me laughed and loved it. Then I was in a car. I guess I hitchhiked and got picked up by a nice elderly couple. The man had a Michigan State hat, even though we were in Ann Arbor. I needed to get to the university, and traffic was terrible, so I let the people drive. We chatted about where I was from and what they did. It turned out they went to Michigan State too. Eventually we passed the university and they didn’t let me out and we just kind of kept on driving. Gradually, the car expanded and became more or less a living room. Through windows at the front which had drapes over them, you could see the city skyline in the dark. They were flying! The car had turned into a plane. As you can imagine, I was very surprised. I asked what was up, why were these people kidnapping me? I don’t remember the reason. I went in the bathroom and it turned out to be like some kind of custard fast food restaurant. They had all kinds of machines for custard and ice cream and frosting. It was pretty unhealthy. Eventually, I chose a hard-boiled egg. When I ate the egg, I discovered that instead of yolk it had a small yolk and a small stick of sausage inside. It was actually kind of brilliant.

Visiting Washington DC when King Kong or some other giant monkey shows up. He starts knocking down the White House while I try to help out in some building across the way. People don’t seem to be evacuating, they’re mostly just watching. It does seem like it would be easy to get away from a giant monkey. The Secret Service are gearing up, so lots of guns around. A bunch of small monkeys break into whatever room I’m in and start wreaking havoc. Fortunately, I have a gun, so I started shooting them. I managed to escape with my mom, and we start heading out of town. The White House is mostly gone and so is King Kong. It doesn’t take long for DC to turn into more or less a small town, where no one seems too concerned about the giant monkey. We end up in a parking garage where we pass some person on really cool motorcycle. He looks like a big black dude with a fancy voice changer helmet, but when he lifts the mask it’s a hot girl. The helmet is labeled Killer Mike. Somehow, I get the motorcycle and we start descending down into the parking garage. Level after level, it keeps getting steeper and tighter and smaller, until we’re basically vertical. Mom has turned into dad, and he wants to keep going lower. Also he has a lawnmower for some reason.

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