Category: Lyfe

Dranks on a Plane

The guy in the seat next to me leans in. Well, the seat next to the seat next to me. He’s leaning real hard. Must be important, I think. He looks like Shaggy from those Scooby-Doo cartoons. Tossled blonde hair, scruffy facial hair, skinny surfer body. Laconic, slightly glazed eyes that seem to be saying, “fuck it, man, whatever.” “What’re…

Love in the Time of Grand Theft Auto V

It’s been over a day and she hasn’t responded to my text. I asked a question – a simple question! – about what she’s doing tonight. I asked yesterday afternoon, assuming she would get back to me yesterday evening, assuming we would then plan something for tonight, something for three hours from now. Do I text again? Double down on…

Casey and the Renaissance Fair

My phone rings almost as soon as I enter the Renaissance Fair. My dad calling. Odd, I think. We usually text to plan phone calls. Could something be wrong? I watch my friends stream through the stained stucco arches of the fair entrance. The phone buzzes, insistent. I press it to my ear and emit a nervous hello. “Hi Cody,”…

Making Friends Through Cartwheels

We’re practicing cartwheels on the sidewalk. It’s past midnight. We’ve played mini-golf in a bar with sculptures of dead presidents. Partied on all five stories of a five story club. Lost friends to drunken dance floors, surprise staircases, and the promise of doner kebab. Cartwheels seem appropriate, like how catching a cab or finding water would be appropriate to individuals…

What it feels like

Part One: Meetings It’s not quite the same as a first kiss under the full moon when a girl responds to your message on a dating application, but it’s nice. It’s welcome. It’s reassuring. Yes, there are people out there who both like your face and want to hear your words. Or read them, as it were. On the ladder…

Plunging the Depths of my Nerdiness

If you’re a Star Wars fan – and I here mean “fan” as abbreviation for “insane fanatic” – it’s been a charged week. First, the powers that be decided to do away with the extended universe. Three decades of novels, comics, and other assorted erratum, swept quietly under the rug. Star Wars, at least in comparison to other franchise properties,…

Meet Elmer

It’s love at first sight. His drab brown suit, rumpled shirt, and ill-fitting khakis. The way he shuffles into the restaurant like he’s lost. Those glasses, thick and foggy, perpetually a syllable away from being pulled gently off his nose. And the hair, my God, the hair. Billowing, wafting, gray, and frequently full of soup. Yes please, Elmer, come dine…

Dancing in Davy Jone’s Locker

It’s New Years Eve and I’m on a cruise ship and I’m sitting in my cabin watching 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea on mute. My two friends are with me. We’re all nursing tall gin and tonics and waiting for the pirate party to start on the top deck. Cruise director Jimmy claimed there would be fireworks at the party…