Category: Self-Referential Bullshit

Return to the Status Quo

It is unbelievably easy to stop doing something if that something requires even a modicum of effort to maintain. Exercising? Effort to maintain. Easy to quit. Smoking? Minimal effort to maintain. Tough to quit. I’d provide more examples, but chances are good that I’d ruin my own thesis. (Marriage? Effort. Easy to quit. Setting small fires? Minimal effort. Tough to…

How Not to Ask a Girl Why She Doesn’t Say “I Love You” Very Often Anymore

Since I can’t be funny every day, here’s an older entry from my previous blog. Revel in its revelations. As with any good memoir, I’ve played with the facts a little. Receive a phone call from said girl, the first time you’ve actually talked to each other in several days. Have a decent and pleasant conversation, even if she’s less…

Find Your Passion

I watched a video about living the life you want to live, etc. You know, crap about how you can get everything you want and need out of just appreciating every moment and seizing every day. Suffice it to say, I’ve been living like that ever since I can remember, so I was fairly unchanged by the melodramatic, hipster overtones…

A Manifesto

I feel like it’s important to start this blog off with some direction. All of the most popular blogs have a focus: Embarrassing celebrity photos, bland fashion commentary, an endless stream of quaint garden pictures, or a combination of all three. I don’t really have access to celebrities or fashion and I feel like my predilections towards cursing and referencing…

In Memoriam

As with every new beginning, it’s important to learn from old beginnings. It’s also important to recognize when a sentence contains two redundant phrases. I think this blog is off to a fantastic start. But let’s not stop while we’re ahead. Plenty more grammatical mischief to come. Instead, let’s plow right into the past with my very first Xanga entry,…