Tag: ey girl!

Hey Dudes Enjoying a Meal Together in an Upscale Steakhouse

Let’s start with the facts: I’m not racist. I know you’re both black, or at least various shades on not-white, unlike everyone else in this restaurant. But that’s not why I can’t stop watching you. Sure, okay, it’s kind of why I noticed you in the first place. But you’re also wearing sweatshirts and knit hats to an expensive meal.…

Hey Girl Shelving Books at the Book Store

I love your dress. Simple, blue, sleek, accentuating all the right curves. I’m enamored with your ankle-high boots too, and those artfully etched black tights. Your hair is a marvel, curled tightly, elaborately into a perfectly unruly head party. And your features…I’d describe them, but I don’t think there are words. Basically, girl, I think you’re pretty. I’d like to…

Post-Run Rundown

7:30 – Notice the sun is setting, decide a run would be a perfect way to cap the day. 7:50 – Realize I just farted around on the internet for twenty minutes. The sun is now set. Sigh. 7:55 – Decide to run anyway. Gotta get swole, ladies. 7:56 – Shorts on. 7:57 – Socks on. 7:58 – Shoes on.…

Hey Girl Who I Kind Of Danced With at the Bar

Hey, I’m that guy you kept running into on the dance floor. I get that you probably wanted to dance with me and I probably wouldn’t have minded dancing with you, but, even after all these years of bumpin’ and grindin’, my understanding of dance protocol is still pretty sketchy. Is it purely about anonymous, sweaty body-touching? Or is dancing…